Failure can be hard to accept. Everyone just tries to avoid it, to escape from it. But this is the wrong way.
Failure is an essential part of our lives. Without failure there is no improvement, no desire, no passion.
If we never fail we will never strive for improvement, and if we never improve will soon get tired of our life, of our daily routines. It might happen to think that we are just fine the way we are, that we have reached an acceptable level of success and that therefore we have no reason to keep challenging ourselves in order to get to next level. In these situations we are tempted to listen to that little voice inside our minds that suggests us to settle down, to stop fighting for a better tomorrow.
But life is ever-changing, it is not possible to stop it. As we decide not to push forward and to relax we condemn ourselves to failure, we accept to be overtaken by others: if we stop many will keep pushing forward and thus we will progressively loose the status we had reached with many sacrifices.
When instead we decide not to settle and that it’s worth to get out from our comfort zone, we will start to make little steps toward our goal, toward our ideal self. Making these steps might require a lot of effort, might be hard and unpleasant, but it’s the only way we have not to get stuck in our present condition.
Not every step will be a success, most of them will just be a total failure.
Anyway you shouldn’t be afraid of it: failure can be more useful than success itself. As we “fail” we receive a precious feedback on our actions and plans and as we understand that our ideas or strategies are not the best ones we can start to seek the right way, the most straightforward path toward our objectives.
If we reach the goal with no failure, if the way is so clear and simple that we don’t need to ask for help or suggestions maybe our goal wasn’t that challenging for us, maybe we should have aimed for something more.
There are a lot of people out there that just go for things they are sure they are capable of, that are so afraid of failure that they decide not to chase their most secret dreams. There are plenty of people who prefer to underestimate themselves rather than to experience some sort of discomfort. Do you really want to live like them? Do you really want to hide behind the myth of a safe life and miss the joy of being the master of your own life?
If you answered “No” to the previous questions, embrace failure, experience it as a gift, and learn as much as you can from it. You will soon realise that the most important thing to do in order to achieve a great success or to realise your life-long dream is to fail, and to learn from it.
For sure you already know most of the reasons why I encourage you to fail more often, but I will now enlighten some of the key benefits of failure:
- Action: You cannot fail if you don’t act and taking action is the first step toward success. If you fail you should be proud of yourself: you have already done the most important step toward your goal, you have already taken action. Maybe you have done the wrong thing, or you have followed the wrong path, but still you have shown yourself that the goal is important to you, that you are ready to challenge yourself in order to achieve it;
- Feedback: from now on try to not to talk about “failure”, call it “negative feedback”. When you fail, you don’t fail as a person. If you don’t get what you wanted it doesn’t mean that you are not able to get it. It simply means that you haven’t done the right thing, that you don’t know yet how to reach that specific goal. You should see every “negative feedback” as a gift: every time a strategy fails you can just add it to the list of “not effective strategies” and keep trying different approaches, soon or later you will find out what really works;
- Discomfort: As you decide to act and to try different things you put yourself out of your comfort zone, you face the unknown. Many might be scared by these feelings, but you should embrace them, savour them as much as you can. Not a single important goal has ever been achieved by lying in a sofa, not a single discovery has ever been made by following well known patterns. Without discomfort there is no improvement and the more you get accustomed to it the more you will be likely to achieve something great;
- Awareness: as you keep failing you will probably realise how hard it is to reach a desired goal, how many hours you need to work to get just a little bit closer to your dream. This progressive realisation will help you to boost your self-confidence and motivation, so that you will be able to fully savour the results of your endeavours.